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I did not expect to be cry at the end of Eimear McBride’s A Girl is a Half-Formed Thing. Nor did I expect to be so devastated by the ending. I was left with tears running down my face murmuring no, no, no. I wanted to have read the ending wrong so badly I turned back and read the final few pages again which only served to make me cry even more. Even now just thinking about it I am getting a bit teary.
I’m not sure how to write about this book it is so good. You have probably heard it is not an easy read. The style is challenging but it is beautiful. It has its own rhythms. And even though the sentences are often short and incomplete, it does not feel choppy at all and even is lyrical:
What’s. See it spin. Look around. What if. I could. I could make. A whole other world a whole civilization in this city that is not home? The heresy of it. But I can. And I can choose this. Shafts of sun. Life that is this. And I can. Laugh at it because the world goes on. And no one cares. And no one’s falling into hell. I can do. Puke the whole lot up.
The narrator of the story is the unnamed girl of the title. We begin when she hasn’t even been born yet. The language of the book here is marvelous and difficult and confusing and exactly conveys a sense of being in utero (at least as we can imagine it).
Most of the time the girl is addressing the you who is her brother, two years older than she is. Her brother, before she was born, had a brain tumor. The doctors removed it but his brain was damaged and they can’t promise that the tumor won’t someday return. She loves her brother dearly but the damage is such that he is never able to live on his own and work at anything besides stocking shelves. In spite of how much the narrator loves her brother he is equally as frustrating, especially when they reach their teens and go to a new school. The teenage world is a savage place and she struggles between wanting to protect her brother and throw him to the sharks.
Their father left when they were small and they are raised by a devoutly Catholic mother. Mammy is very protective of her son and has a tendency to take out her frustrations over his disability on her daughter. She frequently tells her daughter she is no good and nothing but trouble. Combine this with the girl’s uncle raping her in the kitchen when she was thirteen and it seems nearly inevitable that the girl tries hard to really be no good. While she does well in school she starts having sex with any boy who asks. Sex becomes a way to punish herself but it also serves as a substitute for the emotional pain she does not know how to deal with. Eventually she escapes home and goes off to college where she and her roommate regularly go out, drink too much and pick up men.
Just when it seems she might be starting to figure things out, her uncle shows up again and sends her spiraling out of control. When her brother’s tumor returns it is almost more than she can bear.
I have managed to make this book sound really depressing, haven’t I? It’s not depressing. It is raw and disturbing and uncomfortable. It is beautiful and heartbreaking. Now and then it is joyful. By turns I wanted to yell at the narrator, laugh, or wrap her in my arms and hold her tight. I cheered for her to find a way through her pain and dreaded that she would never be able to.
You may have heard McBride wrote this book ten years ago when she was twenty-seven. It took nine years for her to find a publisher. I am glad a publisher finally decided to take a chance on Girl. It is an extraordinary book.
Great post Stefanie … I teared up at the end too. I love your comment that “It’s not depressing. It is raw and disturbing and uncomfortable. It is beautiful and heartbreaking. Now and then it is joyful.” Tell that to my reading group friend who said it was “the worst book I’ve ever read” because it was so grim. I’m with you. It’s far more complex – “raw and disturbing and uncomfortable” is a perfect description.
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Thanks Whisperinggums! I wish I had been able to finish it in time to “attend” you book group! But I didn’t want to rush it and Flanagan had to go back to the library, so… It is a very complex book and I would love to read it again sometime. It’s too bad your reading group friend found it the worst book she ever read. That’s harsh. It’s the best book I’ve read in a long time!
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Cranky! I wrote a response to this and then poof, off it went into the ether. Yes, I was very surprised at my reading friend’s announcement. If I had to name the worst book I’ve read it would be one that was so boring because the characters were all stereotypes, the language cliched and prosaic, and the plot completely predictable. I read it for an online reading group. The only good thing about it was it was quick to read. My friend and I had a long discussion, including by email after the meeting, and it turned out that for her that the definition of good literature is that it *must* end up being positive. For me good literature has to challenge or speak to my heart and/or mind, preferably both. That means I think that it expresses something of importance to the creator. I read another writer recently who said she likes stories that triumph in the end, so that’s what she writes … But as far as I’m concerned that’s about her preference NOT about what stories SHOULD be.
So far, I’m thinking Girl is top of my list for this year, though it’s been a good year so I may or may not rank them in the end.
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Ugh, I hate when that happens! I agree with you on what would constitute my worst book. Good literature must be positive or triumphant? That kind of depresses me. I suspect I know quite a few people with the same belief. I do not require literature to be positive, in fact I find most books that are of the uplifting sort aren’t all that good. My criteria for good lit is very much like yours. I want to be challenged, I want ideas/observations/insights, I want something meaningful both to the author and myself, something that feels authentic. And of course the writing itself has to be top-notch. I don’t think we ask too much 😉
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No, I agree … We don’t want much at all!
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I loved this book too. The Corn Exchange has a play based on the novel which premiered at the Dublin Theatre Festival in September this year. If anything, it’s even better than the core text. I wrote a brief review of it here. http://thenovelprojectchronicles.com/a-girl-is-a-half-formed-thing-at-the-samuel-beckett-theatre-review/
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Pretty grim that this book took 9 yrears to get a publisher but at least it has been a big success in the end. It certainly sounds like a book well worth reading. Interesting the comment that the Dublin production of a play version is even better than the novel. Anyway, must put this on the groaning TBR list!
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Ian, yes it is pretty grim it took so long for it to be published. I can understand publishers might be reluctant to take a chance on such a stylistically challenging book, but they also need to trust the reading public’s willingness to read something different.
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It’s definitely a worthy addition to the TBR pile Ian 🙂
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novelproject, a play? I can’t imagine this as a play. I will definitely be stopping by to read your review of it!
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To be honest, I’ve been intimidated by this book. I think I will just have to take some time to read it without pressure. From everything I’ve heard, it is worth the effort.
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Book Strings, intimidated because of the style? Don’t worry. It is disorienting at first but if you just go with it all very quickly starts to make sense.
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I’ve heard that this is a really tough read- was it a struggle at all to read on when all the horrible things were happening, or were you gripped?
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bendingoverbookwards, I was completely gripped by the book and even when bad things happened I never struggled to keep going, rather I didn’t want to stop reading because I had to know how it turned out.
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You’ve made me reconsider this book. It is one that I thought would be too depressing, but your review says so much more about what makes it important.
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jenclair, it’s definitely not a happy book but it does not leave you low in spirits at the end. There is so much going on that it all balances out. It is one of the best books I’ve read in a long time.
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I’ve come across this one at the book stores, but from reading the blurb and your review, I still think it just might be a subject matter a bit depressing for this time of the year. However, I’ll definitely keep this one in mind, maybe in the new year. 😉
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Arti, if you find you need lighter things this time of year, definitely save Girl for another time. I hope you give it a try though, and if you do, I hope you like it!
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In february this book will be published in translation by a new Dutch publishing house. I will try that before finding myself an English copy. Impressive review.
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Cath, thanks! How wonderful it’s coming out in translation! I hope you like it 🙂
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It sounds like it is well worth the effort and a book to read slowly. I don’t mind dark reads (you have read two almost back to back that deal with difficult situations), but I do feel a little intimidated by the writing style–glad to hear it is not quite as difficult as I have it in my mind to be.
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Danielle, yes, read slowly and carefully. Definitely well worth the effort. I have been having a few dark reads of late, haven’t I? The style is not as difficult as you might think. That’s not to say it is easy, but it definitely is readable.
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I believe you that this book is amazing, and at the same time, I don’t think I can face it. Brain-damaged family members is one of the topics that I just can’t manage to read about in fiction. Do you have any of those? Where it doesn’t matter how good the book, you just can’t face it? For me it’s brain-damaged family members and floods.
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This is such a good question – perhaps it deserves a post on its own Stefanie? – that I can’t resist joining the conversation. I can’t really think of anything that I can’t manage to read about in fiction though I did recently read a very sexually explicit book from a male point of view and I did find it a little hard going at times. I do find certain “things” hard to watch in movies the main one being sociopaths. I can cope with trauma that happens to people but I find it very hard to cope with cold cruelty. I can read it (such as Patrick Suskind’s Perfume) but watching it (such as the recent movie The nightcrawler) pushes me to the edge of my tolerance.
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WG, yes, perhaps it is a topic for a post sometime! I find I can read just about anything like you, but also like you when it comes to movies, I can’t tolerate a lot of graphic violence especially people betting shot in the head and women being raped. I am also unable to watch most horror movies — random acts of senseless violence, lurking in the dark, and the general feeling of claustrophobia and no way to escape give me nightmares.
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Jenny, does it help that the story isn’t about her brother but is very much her relationship with him? I understand having a hard time reading books on certain topics. Some topics are harder to read about than others but I don’t have one that would keep me from reading a book unless it is something overtly misogynistic but that’s a quality of the story/writing and not really a topic. I’ll have to think on that one!
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You know i’ve been thinking about picking up this book for quite some time now. Perhaps I should just do this,
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Wajiha, if you give it a try, I hope you like it!
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Surprisingly, I think this is the first review of this book I’ve read. I have been wondering what it was about and what made it so ‘difficult’. I’d have to think hard about reading it, because I’m no good with cancer narratives (like Jenny, it’s just a block of mine, purely personal) and I’m not always that fond of stories where the writing gets in the way. Though I agree that sometimes they can work beautifully and this one clearly does because the book wouldn’t have had the acclaim otherwise. I’m so glad YOU loved it – nothing more wonderful than a novel that truly moves you deeply.
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Litlove, does it help if I suggest it isn’t a cancer narrative? The book isn’t about her brother at all, but about the girl and the ways in which she tries to cope with everything. She addresses her brother throughout because he is the only one she loves and cares about. He is the one who anchors her and keeps her from completely losing it. The writing and the story work together perfectly. I can’t imagine it being told any other way.
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That IS really useful to know. If you loved it, it must be very good!
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I heard the auther interviewed on Australian radio and it made me want to read it but I havn’t gotten around to it yet (too many other books to read, I am sure you know that feeling) but after reading your post, I must make sure I get this book!!!
http://www.blogsbygabrielle.blogspot.com
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Gabrielle, oh yes, I am familiar with having too many other things to read! It’s a fabulous book so when/if you get the chance to read it I hope you like it!
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